By Myra Chen
Gossip. Synonymous with, yet socially distinguished from, chit-chat, small talk and conversation. Involving the unconfirmed details of another, gossip is seen in a negative light, despite “unconfirmed details” not necessarily being a negative topic.
Derived from the term godsibb, meaning a child’s godparent, gossip came to be a word to describe the relationship between close friends. Later focusing on the social activities of such friends, gossip acquired its negative connotation by being brushed aside as merely a means to destroy and maim the reputation of another by spreading rumors. This nuance has solidified its role in mainstream entertainment media through the appearance of chick flick movies and various television shows. While the portrayal of gossip holds some degree of truth, there are benefits of gossip that go unnoticed and underappreciated.
Gossip’s formal definition of “idle talk of the private affairs of another” does not even nearly encompass all that gossiping is. On the other end of the spectrum, gossip is the sharing of experiences, a conversation promoting bonding over personal matters. Life without gossip is life surrounded by familiar strangers, forever acquaintances. Think about what you and your close friends regularly converse about. Most topics fall under gossip’s umbrella of subjects. Gossip makes up around ⅔ of conversation, encouraging discussion and bonding that would not occur otherwise.
Social awareness is essential for a functioning community. Gossip is merely a means of communicating news and information within a network of people. You would want to know if a coworker got in a car crash or if an acquaintance won the lottery. Both situations are forms of gossip, according to its definition, but are rarely considered to be gossip by most people because there is no apparent negative outcome of knowing such information. And what dictates the outcome? Perspective.
Staying up to date is a means of reinforcing our perception of what is good or bad behavior. The feedback and comments that surface alongside a piece of gossip do just that. Warranted or not, these comments determine what is socially acceptable, penalizing or praising people as necessary. But it’s not to say that gossip’s bad reputation is undeserved. These comments can stick with people for extensive periods of time, tainting one’s reputation.
Uncontrollable in nature, gossip has its roots in the unknown and the untrue. People seek entertainment in malicious comments about another that have not been verified. However, only about 15% of gossip is considered “negative.” Most gossip contains a neutral sentiment. Of course, there are boundaries that should be drawn in every situation. Talking about the physical appearance of another is neither informational nor enlightening.
Knowing the affairs of another is not inherently bad in itself. It’s the people who take gossip to the extremes, taking advantage of information not open to the general public. Bond with people, grow relationships, learn information and stay up to date, but don’t cross the line. Gossip the right way, or not at all.
