By Arielle Nguyen
As a student, I’ve always felt as motivated as your standard white-collar worker in your drama-filled movie. Is there more to my work? Am I wasting my time? Is everything really … worth it?
Obviously, it’s worth it — in the end. Look on the bright side. It will be worth it if I get 100% on this test. If we win this competition, the hours of practice and labor will be worth it. To achieve this rush of dopamine, this sense of belonging, I need to get through the exhaustion, the labor and the expectations. It’s worth it in the end. Right?
Maintaining that level of positivity will get you through anything, right? It has gotten me through almost a decade of school, now. What’s another four to ten years of desperately trying to convince myself that the toils and stress I feel now will somehow be worth it?
In the last two paragraphs, sentence after sentence came examples of toxic positivity.
What is toxic positivity?
Consistently repressing, or bottling, negative emotions and replacing them with faux optimism is a phenomenon known as toxic positivity, according to the University of Minnesota.
Regardless of age, poisonous optimism is a common human behavior. I’m sure several individuals have said, “It will work out in the end” or “Good vibes only.” How can you be so sure? Are you just trying to convince yourself that your current problems… aren’t problems at all?
The “perfect” life will constantly require a craving for a happy, upbeat mindset, no matter what you’re going through. Are you really expected to dismiss your troubles?
This stigma associated with mental health is spreading like wildfire… especially into the lives of students. As a student myself, the act of even speaking about my problems makes me feel uncomfortable. Societal pressure forces me to look and feel so full of joy and youth to the point where I resist voicing my dissatisfaction for fear of “bringing the group down” or “creating a negative space.”
Reading the room is one thing, but holding in your negativity is quite another. However, there are ways to express your anger or melancholy in a healthy, non-repressive way!
How do we combat toxic positivity?
Developing a growth mindset can be rather daunting. In essence, a growth mindset prioritizes … growth! Cultivating intelligence, creativity and healthy relationships takes time. In contrast, a fixed mindset believes that current skills can’t be nurtured, or that you won’t get better because you peaked.
Occasionally, influences inside our own home can contribute to toxic positivity. Get rid of your “Good vibes!” and “Happy days!” picture frames. Although these mantras are beneficial in the short term, they aren’t sustainable and instead more like a temporary painkiller. Making room for your own thoughts and emotions will assist in developing a relationship with your mental and emotional state, even if it’s uncomfortable.
My favorite way to recognize toxic thinking is by scribbling my thoughts on paper. I typically write down my negative thoughts because I don’t feel safe saying them aloud. Occasionally, I’ll hand them off to a friend, a parent or someone I trust. However, no matter the situation, I possess a tough resentment towards confrontation, so I have work to do on myself, too. The act of expressing my negativity is one step closer to a healthier relationship with my emotions.
Sometimes, however, the exhaustion that follows trying to understand your emotions can cast you into a spiral.
Even though mental health has gradually grown into a positive, “let’s talk” topic, the stigma still carries negativity. Regardless, you should treat your mental health like your physical health: if something looks or feels broken, it’s probably time to get it checked.
Motivation can manifest as toxic positivity.
My experience with toxic positivity was more of a source of motivation. I struggle with completing assignment after assignment sometimes, so I would tell myself: look at the bright side. You’ll get into college with these A’s. The nights of tears and puffy eyes will be worth that sheet of paper at graduation.
This mindset isn’t healthy. I began to spiral at the beginning of my freshmen year, and somehow, I lost that drive that motivated me to get through each day.
Everyone has different goals, and the ability to manifest motivation to accomplish them varies from person to person. If your end goal is a 4.0 GPA or a successful sports season, it’s natural to be worried about experiencing burnout. How do you keep up? How do you finish strong?
Here are some solutions that will hopefully reduce the negative dread you feel towards tasks:
Create a to-do list.
Broad assignments such as “Study” or “DBQ packet” are intimidating! Split these up into tinier, more manageable categories such as “Chapter 3.1 test review” or “create flashcards.”
Additionally, a list doesn’t have to be limited to homework! To-do lists can include basic tasks such as “take a shower” or “take out the trash” as well as broader tasks including “buy groceries before next week.”
Spin the wheel.
I used an online “Wheel of Names” to decide what to do on my to-do list as it forces me to complete them. Now I’m completing my first draft of this article because I spun the wheel and whoopdeedoo. But guess what? I finished my first draft! I call that a win.
Use study timers such as the Pomodoro timer.
Studying for long periods of time can be draining. Instead, you can study for one hour and have thirty minutes to yourself afterward! There are many online timers for study sessions that typically have breaks in between.
Here is a free Pomodoro timer. You are able to add tasks or change the colors/themes/time with the settings!
Set rewards
Recently, I started rewarding myself with candy each time I finish something on my to-do list.
Also, rewards can be anything you enjoy! Movies? TV shows? That last page in your romance novel?
Helpful Resources
If you feel as though you’re really struggling with motivation or mental health, there are resources to help you!
If you’re a student from Fountain Valley High School, you can see your Guidance Specialist or a counselor! Teachers are also here to help and provide advice for assignments or give extensions on certain assignments (this will vary from teacher to teacher).
Above all, however, you as a growing student and person come first. Always prioritize your mental health, feelings, and problems. Your life will learn to grow around it. And when it does, completing those homework assignments and chores will seem so much easier.
Toxic positivity isn’t your best friend. Stop live, laugh, loving the brighter side and start live, laugh, loving yourself.
