By Emily Chan
You are met with utter tragedy this holiday season because you are the Grinch’s secret Santa! It’s one thing to shop for someone who says they “don’t want anything” for Christmas and another to shop for someone who hates Christmas altogether.
Dr. Seuss’s “How the Grinch Stole Christmas,” tells the tale of a grumpy green creature called the “Grinch” whose internal despair prompts him to “steal” Christmas from the citizens of Whoville by taking all of their presents and decorations.
If you’re shaking in your boots at the mere prospect of buying a gift for a slightly taller Oscar the Grouch with a criminal record, this is the guide for you!
If people aren’t even willing to touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half-foot pole, you can only be led to believe one thing: you stink. Humans might get away with it (kind of) by spraying deodorant all over their bodies, but if you have luscious green fur, that barbaric behavior won’t fly under the radar. Thus, it’s necessary to target the root of the problem: his shower routine or lack thereof.
Lush is known for its innovative bath and shower products and its over-the-top customer service. Because the Grinch is antisocial, going into Lush would be a nightmare! You’ll not only score points with this green fella for ridding him of his onion scent but also for braving social interaction with others. Some personal recommendations would be the Snow Fairy Gift Set, the Scrubee body butter bar and the Snow Angel Choir Shower Jelly.
2. Scarves
From skinny to large, a collection of scarves is crucial for the Grinch to keep up with the chilly trends of Whoville. If you’re feeling bougie with a price range of $180-$540, Acne Studios’s scarves are all the rage with their wide variety of colors and styles to choose from. Or, perhaps your heart is ten times larger than mine and you want to splurge on the Dior Oblique Scarf for the slim price of $1,500.
Of course, if you’re balling on a budget, hitting the thrift store or making one yourself are both great options
3. Skin 1004
Many attribute the Grinch’s cruel attitude towards Christmas to a desire for love. However, by sticking to deep themes and lessons, you undermine the true question we should all be asking ourselves: What if the Grinch hated Christmas because he hated how dry the winter climate made his skin? Wouldn’t you try to steal happiness from a whole town if you woke up to see that your glass skin had lost its divine dewiness?
To improve the terrible mood his dull skin causes him, focuses on purchasing skin care products that lock in moisture. If you’re looking for a bang for your buck, Skin 1004’s sunscreens, ampoules and serums are where it’s at. They’re popular for their use of Centella Asiatica in their products, an ingredient that is known for its soothing and anti-inflammatory properties.
4. Anastasia Beverly Hills DIPBROW Line
There’s one thing the Grinch secretly loves more than stealing toys from children and that is having snatched eyebrows. For a creature with eyebrows arched enough to make James Charles jealous, give him the gift of brow definition with the Anastasia DIPBROW Pomade. This pomade was a 2016 staple when big blocky eyebrows coupled with the deepest cut crease and thickest eyeliner wings were in. Pair it up with the Laminated Look Brow Kit and count yourself as the Grinch’s new best friend.
All you have to do is add a few of these premium gifts to your shopping card, swipe that card or hand in that cash and you’ll be on your way for a successful secret Santa!
